How Can I Sift Through The Lies And Find The Truth?

Today, I simply want you to read this passage of Scripture and answer the question that follows.

This is the message which we have heard from Him and declare to you, that God is light and in Him is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us.
1 John 1:5-10 NKJV

Are you lying or practicing truth?

How Can I Squeeze My Finances Into My Recovery?

Me: My name is Nick. I’m a grateful believer who struggles with co-dependency and pride. Again, my name is Nick.
Everyone: <Hi, Nick!>

Ok, now that introductions are out of the way, I’d like to jump right into something I felt God really pushing me on this morning…you know, one of those, “the Lord really pressed this on my heart” kinda mornings. So, without sounding too churchy or religulous, let’s have at it!

For the past two years I’ve had the privilege of being a part of an AWESOME program known as Celebrate Recovery. I’ve been the worship leader. I’ve been a participant. I’ve been the media guy. I’ve been the Ministry Leader. I’ve been an Open-Share Group Leader. I’ve been a Step Study Leader. I’ve been a learner. I’ve been a friend. I’ve been an accountability partner. I’ve struggled. I’ve fallen. I’ve gotten back up.

Most of all, I’ve arrived at the conclusion that Jesus needs to be my EVERYTHING! That without him, I’m NOTHING (love the song ‘Search My Heart’ by Hillsong United)! And when I says ‘everything’ I mean EVERYTHING!

I spent the first few years of my walk with Christ keeping him at arms distance, maybe further. I wanted God’s promises of salvation (who wants to go to hell?), yet I didn’t want to hand over control, I didn’t want him to change me, I wanted to be ME! Pick up my cross? Are you high?

Thank God things changed. I changed.

I realized that on my own I was HOPELESS. I kept doing the same thing over and over again. I kept revisiting those dark places you keep secret from everyone you know. I needed help.

Jesus was and IS that help. OK…I’ve TOTALLY gotten off track from where I originally wanted to go, but oh well. Jesus rescued from me drugs, alcohol, and pornography…where I was seeking IMMEDIATE satisfaction, he invaded with ETERNAL glory! He became my EVERYTHING…well, almost…

I really struggled to trust God with my finances. I didn’t quite understand why God wanted anything to do with MY money, yes MY money! I remember actually telling my wife that if she was going to tithe to NOT tell me and NOT let me see it! The church was all about money…or so I thought. Now here’s a part of recovery that we don’t discuss very often, we think it’s all about drugs and alcohol…

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Matthew 6:21 NKJV

Wow! Here’s Jesus spitting out some TRUTH! I had to pick up the Bible ON MY OWN and start reading before I finally started to understand that it was NEVER ABOUT THE MONEY and ALWAYS ABOUT MY HEART! God DIDN’T want my money; he wanted ME!

No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.
Matthew 6:24 NKJV

(just a heads up…mammon refers to riches or material wealth…I just looked it up)

Celebrate Recovery is all about LIFE CHANGE! Celebrate Recovery is all about being FREED from life’s hurts, habits, and hang-ups! Finances are no different! We point our finger at the alcoholic or the drug addict and say they need help…all while bitterly thinking, “Is the pastor REALLY talking about money again?”

We ALL need help.

How are your finances? If finances are a matter of the heart; how’s your heart?

What Is It That's Changed About You?

What happened to you?
Something’s changed, but I can’t quite tell what it is?
You seem different.

Becoming a follower of Jesus is consciously choosing to live a life of CHANGE. As you grow closer to Jesus, as your relationship deepens, you can’t help but want to change. It comes naturally. You want to leave your old ways behind. There’s a desire to be BETTER. To NOT change is like a lone domino standing firm, standing tall, unwavering, not budging simply because it didn’t WANT to fall down like the rest. Or maybe it’s the other way around…

Maybe becoming a follower of Christ is like the domino that stands firm, dares to be different, isn’t afraid of going against the norm, doesn’t fear clashing with popular culture, BUT as we all know, it would require an OUTSIDE FORCE to stop a domino from falling, especially to stop the force exerted be each previously fallen domino. It would take a SUPERNATURAL force.

Did someone say something about the Holy Spirit?

As followers of Jesus we changed, but not by our OWN power, but by the power of GOD, the sacrifice of JESUS, and the HELP of the Holy Spirit all working together within us and around us. We CHOOSE to change, but God MAKES IT HAPPEN! He gives us the supernatural courage and strength to be the domino that DOESN’T fall, the domino that says, ‘no more.’

But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me was not in vain; but I labored more abundantly than they all, yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me.
1 Corinthians 15:10 NKJV

It is by the grace of God that I am who I am, that you are who you are. I cannot claim credit. You cannot claim credit. We gotta give credit where credit is due. It’s God who is alive in us, working in us, changing us, growing us, blessing us. Think of all Paul’s accomplishments, feats that we marvel at today, things we strive to do, a person we desire to be like, and read how he responds…he doesn’t bask in the attention, NO! he directs our eyes, our hearts to the one who made it all possible. He points us to Jesus.

Is this what you’re doing? Are you pointing people to Jesus? Do you give God credit for the changes in your life? Do you acknowledge his greatness?

Believing it’s all because of you will lead to a self-righteous attitude and a lack of gratitude. What has he DONE in your life? What is he DOING in your life?

Give him thanks. Then tell someone.

How's Your Integrity?

Wow…what a week! This whole idea of self-examination, the process of focusing on ME instead of OTHERS hasn’t been easy, but it’s been good! Well, today marks the end of our discussion on Spiritual Inventory (at least the first half of it).

So far we’ve discussed relationships with others, priorities in life, and attitude. Today, we’ll end things by discussing INTEGRITY. Many of us have most likely heard this word before, but might not actually know what it is. With that said, let’s start today by offering up a definition.

Integrity is an adherence to moral and ethical principles. It is soundness of character or, in other words, honesty. HONESTY. That word can send chills down your spine. Speaking truth. Letting people know who you are. Being real. Being authentic. Letting your guard down. Taking the mask off. That strikes fear into a lot of people. But INTEGRITY goes a step further.

Integrity isn’t merely being honest with others, it’s being honest ALL THE TIME. Integrity is who you are when you think no one else is looking. When the door is shut and the lights are off and no one else is around, who are you? Do you portray yourself differently in the view of others and when you’re by yourself? Do you suffer from self-inflicted multiple personality disorder?

Again, it’s comes down to the question, who are you? Let’s take a look at Scripture.

Do not lie to each other. You have left your old sinful life and the things you did before.
Colossians 3:9 NCV

Think about it. How much time do you spend pretending? How much time do you spend trying to maintain the lie of who you’d LIKE to be, who you WISH you were? Paul clearly tells us to stop lying to one another. Stop pretending. In Christ we don’t have to worry about putting up a front, we don’t have to be somebody for someone else. In Christ we are made NEW. We’ve left our old way of life, we’ve left the things we did before. We have to learn to let go of our past and embrace who we are in the present…a son or a daughter of a loving, forgiving, merciful God.

Ask yourself…when have I been dishonest? Have I stolen things? Do I lie and exaggerate about who I am and what I’ve done? Do I pretend to be one way with my recovery group, my church family, and another with my co-workers, my family, my friends?

You CAN find freedom from your hurts, habits, and hang-ups.

You CAN be set free from the pain of your past.

You CAN experience joy and happiness in your present.

You CAN overcome your current circumstances.

You CAN find hope.

You CAN be you.

Don’t miss the chance. Don’t miss the opportunity to be the man or woman God created you to be, purposed you to be, desires you to be. He wants to change the world through you, but to do that, you’ve gotta be willing to BE YOU! You don’t have to run FROM your past because he’ll help you THROUGH it. Address it. Confess it. Own it. Leave no stone unturned. Keep no secrets. Experience what it means to be FREE.

How’s your integrity?

How's Your Attitude?

Hello! If you’re reading this article this morning, afternoon, evening…whenever, I want to welcome you to the gauntlet, to the cage, to the ring, to the battle arena. I say this because that’s exactly what we’re going to be doing today—FIGHTING! Sound weird? It is.

Anytime we take an inward look, anytime we make the decision to take an honest look at ourselves, choosing to take a break from pointing our finger at others, choosing to take a break from planning out everyone else’s life, we engage in a war that leaves many casualties…in fact, most refuse to see it through. The majority walk away. The majority wave a white flag, not in surrender to God’s will, but in surrender to complacency. Do you still want to continue?

This week we’ve been discussing 4 different aspects of our character, 4 areas of our lives that we need to demolish and rebuild…renovate if you will. If you’d like to catch up, it all started here.

Today, we’ll be looking at our attitudes, your attitude, my attitude. If people can identify your PRIORITIES simply by watching what you DO, then people can get an idea of who you are by how you act (ATTITUDE).

Who are you?

Are you the angry, short-tempered husband, wife, father, mother, friend, or neighbor who comes home from work with little to no patience and takes it out on everyone and everything? Are you man, woman, or child who is always complaining about how things are; the person carrying bitterness over your current circumstances OR possibly still hung up on PAST circumstances and events? Are you tired? Are you sarcastic? Is gratitude something you see in others, but lack yourself? Is everyone else making your life miserable?

What’s up? Who are you?

If ANY of these questions rings a bell, don’t worry and don’t stress, you don’t have to live like this. You don’t have to remain stuck in your nastiness and yes, that’s EXACTLY what it is…nastiness. And don’t think this is me pointing my finger, I’m right there, right here alongside you. My attitude absolutely SUCKS sometimes! BUT, I don’t stay there. Here’s why…

Get rid of all bitterness, passion, and anger. No more shouting or insults, no more hateful feelings of any sort.
Ephesians 4:31 GNT

The Bible makes it VERY clear that I am NOT to remain in the nastiness of my attitude. It says I am to GET RID of all _________ (insert your crap in that blank). GET RID of it! That means LET IT GO! Think about it. Think about who you are in your anger. Think about what you say when you’re tired and ‘easily annoyed.’ Think about the relationships you’ve destroyed because you’ve held on so tightly to the hate in your heart. Think about it.

God did just stop with that verse. If it wasn’t enough to do it simply because God said so, he gives ANOTHER reason.

Instead, be kind and tender-hearted to one another, and forgive one another, as God has forgiven you through Christ.
Ephesians 4:32 GNT

We are to be consumed with kindness and forgiveness because GOD HAS FORGIVEN US THROUGH CHRIST! Wait, ‘because’ is not the right word…the verse uses the word AS…we are to forgive others AS God has forgiven us. We are to show kindness to others AS God has forgiven us. That word AS means we are to model our ATTITUDES after God’s attitude toward us…love, grace, mercy, and total, complete forgiveness.

So, I ask you today, how’s your attitude? What does your attitude tell others about who God is?

What Are The Priorities In Your Life?

What’s up? This week we’re learning what it means to take a long, hard, honest look in the mirror and LOVE what we see. This week we’re learning how to look into the mirror and not see our problems, our mistakes, our shortcomings, but see ourselves as God sees us—his masterpiece (in case you missed it, you can read about it here)!

Yesterday, we started by looking at our relationships (you can read about it here) and today, we’re going to discuss our PRIORITIES. Oh snap! Someone just closed their web browser. Someone just rolled their eyes and thought, “No I’m not! You can talk about my relationships, but don’t you DARE talk about my priorities!” Strike a nerve? I hope it did. I say this because I’ve thought it, I’ve struggled with it, I STRUGGLE WITH IT (present tense).

Being a follower of Christ has nothing to do with WHAT YOU’VE DONE and everything to do with WHO YOU’RE FOLLOWING. You’re not the mistakes of your past. You’re not your bad decisions. You’re a follower of Jesus. He saved you. He rescued you. He’s working in you. He’s your everything!

I say this because often we identify ourselves by the things we’ve done and the things we are doing. Instead of finding our identity in Christ, we are anger, we are bitterness, we are alcoholism, we are drug addiction, we are envy, we are an abortion, we are divorce, we are failures, we are…

Other people see it to. You’re not alone. Ever ask yourself WHY they see it? Ever ask yourself WHY people label you? People see your priorities by your ACTIONS, not your WORDS. You might not like it but people are watching you. Your spouse. Your children. Your family. Your friends. Your co-workers. They see you. They watch you. You think you’re living in secret, but someone knows. What are you doing? What are your priorities?

Here’s what God says about priorities…
Seek first God’s kingdom and what God wants. Then all your other needs will be met as well.
Matthew 6:33 NCV

Seek FIRST God’s kingdom and what God wants. Seek FIRST God’s kingdom and what God wants…oh I already wrote that, but it probably needs to be read two or three times. Does God take priority in your life? I know he’s not #1 in my life all the time, not even most of the time, it’s not even 50/50.

What areas of your life are you not putting God first? What in your past is blocking God in your present? What’s the driving force for your ambition and pleasure? What ARE your priorities? In your life? Your job? Your friendships? Your personal goals?

Be honest. Don’t be afraid to make necessary changes. Let it go. Let it go. Let it go. Embrace the freedom that’s available to you through a relationship with Jesus Christ, don’t hang on to the mistakes of your past. Don’t let your selfishness kick God out of his rightful seat as #1 in your life.

What are the priorities in your life?

How Are Your Relationships With Others?

Probably one of the most difficult things that we can face as growing Christians, as men and women trying to figure out what it means to grow in Christ, is self-examination. We pray for God’s salvation, we pray for his forgiveness, his grace, his mercy, and when it comes, it sure is AWESOME isn’t it? We want to tell everyone we know. We want to see our family members saved, our friends, the people we work with, the people we walk past on the street…we can’t help but leak Jesus everywhere we go. That’s GREAT, but amidst the celebration, we can easily lose sight of ourselves and the changes God wants to make in our lives.

God has this amazing plan for your life. He wants to grow you. He wants to bless you. He wants to change the world through you. And it’s EXCITING! It’s AWESOME! BUT…it’s HIS plan for YOU. Too often we see our plan, our direction, our purpose, and we try to push it on others. We see how God has changed us, or at least started to, and so we try to change those around us. We see their problems, their hurts, their bad decisions, and we try to fix them because we know a BETTER way, we have a BETTER plan.

God wants to change YOU.
God will change THEM.
God saved YOU.
God will save THEM.
God has a plan for YOU.
God has a plan for THEM.
God is God, you are not, I am not.

Jesus says to take the log out of your eye. Jesus says look in the mirror. Jesus says take care of you first, THEN, he’ll use you to help others. Maybe you need to forgive. Maybe you need to apologize. I don’t know what you need to do because we’re all different, your story is not my story and vice versa; however, I do know this, you and I need to acknowledge and admit our part in the relationship (what’s been done to US; what we’ve done to OTHERS). We need to forgive ourselves AND forgive others.
Jesus prayed for us to be forgiven as we forgive others (Matthew 6:12). If you were to be forgiven as you forgive others, would you be forgiven?

That’s tough. That hurts. That’s not easy to get over. If you’re still holding on to unforgiveness, ask yourself why. Get to the root of it. If you’re unable to let go of the pain in your past, it’ll continue eating away at you, putting the brakes on growth, keeping freedom just out of reach.

So, who’s hurt you? Who are you holding a grudge against? Are you consumed with thoughts of revenge? Are you jealous? Are you critical? Do you gossip? Are you blaming others for YOUR behaviors? Who have you hurt?

Own your part. Answer the difficult questions. Be set free from the bondage of bitterness, envy, and hate. God sent his son, Jesus Christ, to die on a cross FOR YOU in order to have a relationship WITH YOU.

How are your relationships with others?

Why Is It So Difficult To Look In The Mirror?

What does it mean to grow IN Christ? I don’t know about you, but I believe most people either don’t KNOW what it means or don’t WANT to know. I’ve heard it said that ignorance is bliss and I’d have to agree. It’s easier to NOT know. Knowing means accountability. Accountability means conviction. Conviction means choosing right or wrong, his ways or my ways.

Who wants that?

I do. And hopefully you do as well.

This week I’ll be discussing 4 different areas of life, our lives (mine, yours, ours, us) that if we focus on, seek guidance in, relinquish control of, we can experience the love, grace, kindness, mercy, and PEACE of God.

I’ll be discussing…

#1 Your Relationships with Others
#2 Priorities in Your Life
#3 Your Attitude
#4 Your integrity

I hope you’ll join me in this probably painful adventure of self-examination and discovery. I hope you’ll join me in figuring out what it means to LEAN ON and LEAN INTO God’s presence, his power, and his promises. I hope you’ll join me for a Lamentations 3:40 kinda week.

What's The Hurry?

As I sat idling at the red light this morning, thinking about my day, thinking about how I somehow missed the fact that my youngest had no school (yes, while he’s buckled into his booster seat, on the way to my workplace), thinking about Celebrate Recovery, just thinking…I noticed that each vehicle making a left turn cut the turn short, it might have been ever so slightly, but nevertheless they cut the turn.

Why?

Why are we always looking for shortcuts? We look for shortcuts in our marriages, our important relationships, our jobs, our finances, our driving, our EVERYTHING. Shorter. Faster. What’s the rush? What’s the hurry?

It’s something as simple as a left turn. It saves such a miniscule amount of time that I don’t even think we can consciously measure it. What’s the point?

What if Noah took a shortcut and made a slightly smaller ark? What if Abraham took a shortcut and traveled only so far? What if Moses took a shortcut and missed the Red Sea? What if Joshua took a shortcut and circled Jericho 6 days? What if John the Baptist took a shortcut and napped THAT day? What if Jesus took a shortcut and imparted a bit of grace, took a little of our guilt?

Shortcuts suck.
Slow down.
Take your time.
Enjoy the moment.
Take it all in.
Do it right.
Do it well.

What areas of your life are you cutting short? What shortcuts are you taking?

5 Lies Of Mistaken Identity

This week I’ve been discussing the often difficult task of really getting to know yourself. Yes, digging through the crap that’s been piled up year after year and lies that have been told time and time again, oh, and don’t forget all the hurts, pains, and defensive walls you’ve put up. And somewhere in the middle of it all you find you.

So far I’ve asked 3 questions:

How do I deal with the reality of who I am?
Who do people think I am?
Who do I think I am?

Today, I want to take a different approach and list a few of the lies that many of us hear and most of us believe. Read’em. Own’em. Take a good look inward and ask yourself, “Do I believe that?” Whatever you do, do not take this as an opportunity to point your finger at someone else or else you’ll miss the whole point.

These are lies I’ve believed.
These are lies I’ve struggled with.
These are lies I’ve overcome (and so can you!).

#1 Some Things Are Better Left Unsaid—Lie! Well, at least in terms of keeping secrets and holding on to past hurts, this is a major lie! This is the lie that keeps you stuck in the past. This is the lie that breeds the “It’ll go with me to the grave” mentality. Pastor Rick Warren often says, “You’re only as sick as your secrets.” It’s true! If you’re unwilling to FACE IT, you’re never going to GET OVER IT. If you’re unwilling to CONFESS IT, you’ll remain CONFINED TO IT. If you want to be released from the pain of your past, you’ve gotta share it with someone you trust.

#2 Nobody Understands—Lie! In our sickness, in our denial, we convince ourselves that no one and we mean no one could possibly understand what we’ve gone through. Nobody can relate to the physical/ emotional/ sexual abuse I endured. Nobody understands the pain of my addiction or the lengths I went to in order to satisfy it. Nobody understands. Nobody gets it. Nobody…wants to hear your EXCUSES! How about that? Here’s the deal, once you’ve allowed yourself to get to this point, once you’ve convinced yourself that nobody could possibly understand, you’ve contracted the disease known as TERMINAL UNIQUENESS. The only cure is to open up and share your hurts.

#3 If They Knew The Real Me, They Wouldn’t Like Me—Lie! Chances are people WANT to know the REAL you because the fake you sucks! People are tired of your lies. People are tired of your games. People are tired of your show. However, in our sickness, our perspective is skewed. We don’t see their desire to KNOW US; instead we see indignation and judgment. We become imprisoned by our own insecurities. We cannot base our health on the opinions of others. Chances are they are dealing with their OWN insecurities, their OWN denial. You cannot control them, but you CAN work on yourself. Open up. Be real. Live free.

#4 I’m A (Insert Past Mistake Here)—Lie! I’ve heard this one many times. In fact, I’ve said this one many times. I used to identify myself by my struggles, by the pain of my past, by the hurts that others have caused in my life. I allowed guilt and shame to rule my life and guide my every step with these lies. This is the struggle of finding your identity. As long as you identify yourself with a hurt, pain, past mistake, or struggle…that’s who you’ll be. I don’t know about you, but I want something MORE.

#5 I’ll Never Change—LIE! I was an alcoholic. I was an addict. I was the victim of sexual abuse. I was…I was…I was… What a POWERFUL word! WAS! The Bible tells us that IN Christ was are a NEW CREATION! Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new, (2 Corinthians 5:17 NKJV). I’m NOT my past mistakes. I’m NOT my bad decisions. I’m NOT a victim! I spent nearly 30 years believing these lies. I spent nearly 30 years believing I couldn’t change. I spent nearly 30 years without the hope of a brighter tomorrow. In Christ I found the courage to face my past and the strength to overcome it.

Celebrate Recovery (CR) is a Christ-centered recovery program that is specifically designed to address these lies by exploring the TRUTH of God's word. CR meets in a large group, learning from various lessons and hearing stories of personal victory. CR gathers in small groups, sharing hurts, struggles, as well as victories in an open, honest, and safe environment.

At Celebrate Recovery people are discovery WHO they are.
At Celebrate Recovery people are changing.
At Celebrate Recovery people are being SET FREE!

Who Do I Think I Am?

Ok. So, yesterday we talked about how OTHERS perceive us (in case you missed it, you can read it here). Today, we’re going to look at how we view ourselves—someone just said “crap” and a few others sighed—I know, it’s tough to take an honest look at ourselves, but it’s absolutely necessary.

In many ways there’s a connection, a correlation between how we view ourselves and how others view us. Many times the way others perceive us has everything to do with the façade we create, the lies we speak, the mask we put on. And we do these things because of the way we view ourselves.

We create a façade because we don’t like the reality.
We tell lies because we’re in denial of the truth or we simply don’t want to deal with it.
We put on a mask because we don’t like who we really are.

Think about it. The pretty girl looks in the mirror and tells herself that she’s ugly. The smart kid sulks in his room all alone thinking he’s stupid. The popular girl wonders where all her friends are. The star jock thinks he isn’t good enough. The mother is convinced she’s failing as a parent. The husband doubts his ability to love his wife. The leader believes everyone is out to get her.

You see what you want. You hear what you want. You think what you want. You believe what you want. Sometimes we distance ourselves so far from the truth, so out of touch with reality, that we start to believe the façade, we believe the lies, we only see the mask.

If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
1 John 1:8 NKJV

John said when we deceive ourselves the truth is not in us. Let this sink in for a moment. When we deceive ourselves, meaning when we believe the lies, the truth is not in us. Wow! How many of us have lived in this mess for far too long? How many of us have lived without the truth being in us? How many of us have allowed our mind, body, and soul to be consumed by lies?

It’s an IDENTITY CRISIS. Instead of clinging to the truths of God’s word, instead of hearing that you are a masterpiece, that you were created in his image and likeness, that you are his son or daughter, you base your existence on cultural and social standards. I need a big house. I need a nice car. I need name brand clothes. I need a skinny waist. I need a higher GPA. I need to produce big numbers. I need people to like me.

What happened to, “I need Jesus”?

Outside of Jesus we’re lost. Outside of Jesus the Bible tells us we’re simply wandering around, lost in a world of darkness (John 8:12). Outside of Jesus our eyes become blinded to the truth, blinded to reality. We lose sight of WHO we REALLY are. I Christ I am a NEW CREATION, the old is GONE, the new has COME (2 Corinthians 5:17). It doesn’t matter what others think so long as you yourself do not see the truth, so long as you don’t see who you really are.

Who do you see in the mirror? Who do you think you are?

Who Do People Think You Are?

Who do people THINK you are? How do they PERCEIVE you? Do their ideas match up to the reality of your true character or do they know a mere illusion, a fantasy if you will?

Maybe it started as a child. Maybe there was an abusive relationship at home. Maybe you had a physically present, but emotionally absent parent. Maybe your family couldn’t afford the brand name clothes that all your friends were wearing. Maybe you grew up with a tick. Maybe you were different. Maybe you felt like an outcast. Maybe you just wanted to fit in…

And to do so, you had to make up story after story, mixing imagination and truth, blending lies with reality…ultimately having difficulty distinguishing between the two.

That’s how it started for me as child.
That’s how I fit in as a teen.
That's how I coped as a young adult.
That’s how I hid as a Christian, as a so-called follower of Christ.

Fearful of people knowing the REAL you, you PRETEND to be something or someone else. What would they think? How would they react? What would they say? How could they still be my friend?

You end up becoming to entangled in lies, so lost in the fantasy, that you lose sight of a way out. You struggled to backtrack far enough to locate the truth. How can I start over when I don’t even know where to begin? Let me tell you where to start: right here, right now, this moment.

If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice truth.
1 John 1:6 NKJV

No more lies.
No more hiding.
No more mask.
No more show.

It’s time to start practicing TRUTH. You don’t have to act one way around one person and another around someone else. You just got to be YOU! Be funny. Be sad. Be frustrated. Be REAL!

God doesn’t love the façade; he loves YOU! He sees right through the mask you’re wearing. He sees straight through to your heart. He sees the pain. He sees the fear. He sees the guilt, the shame, the sadness. He wants to take it FROM you and replace it with HOPE!

You’re experiencing an identity crisis and the solution, the answer to the problem, is Jesus.

I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.
Galatians 2:20 NKJV

This is the TRUTH that we gotta start living by. This is the TRUTH that we gotta start practicing. We need to acknowledge that Christ lives in us. We are not identified by the pain of our past, the mistakes that we’ve made, the hardships we’ve faced, the names we’ve been called…we are the SONS and DAUGHTERS of the God of the universe through our faith in Jesus.

Who do you want people to know? Who do you want people to see? Who are you?

How Do I Deal With The Reality Of Who I Am?

What is character? Is it WHO you are? Is it WHAT you do? Is it HOW you do things? What is it? Searching the dictionary for a definition, which often leads to looking up the definition of other words, I found this, “the aggregate of features and traits that form the individual nature of some person or thing.” Someone just read that and asked, “What is aggregate?” An aggregate is a collection, it’s a cluster, it’ a coming together of smaller parts in order to create the greater whole. So, basically, your character is the sum total of all the little, intricate parts of your personality, traits, your very nature, all bunched together to create, well, you.

We don’t talk about character very often because, quite frankly, at least in the church world, we don’t want to talk about ourselves, at least not the REAL us. And this brings up an interesting point, a point that we’ll be discussing over the course of the next few days: Who are you?

It’s a difficult question to answer. Hold on, I think that would be better stated like this…it’s a difficult question to answer HONESTLY.

There’s only ONE you, yet for some reason we portray ourselves quite differently depending on where we are and who we’re around. There’s only ONE you, yet we live as if there are THREE.

#1 There’s the character people perceive or think you are.
#2 The character you perceive or think you are.
#3 Finally, there’s the character you ACTUALLY ARE.

How is this possible? How can this be?

This is the message which we have heard from Him and declare to you, that God is light and in Him is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us.
1 John 1:5-10 NKJV

I believe the Bible, the very word of God inspired through man, gives us a few ideas, a few indications of just how this case of mistaken identity and misconstrued character occurs.

If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice truth (v.6)—Ok. So, this would answer the question of how #1 occurs. We lie. We put on a mask. We say one thing and do another. We portray one way of living while living another. People cannot see our hearts, they cannot hear our thoughts, they only see what we do and hear what we say.

If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us (v.8)—Here’s the answer to #2. The Bible says we can actually DECEIVE OURSELVES! That’s ludicrous! Shouldn’t we know ourselves better than anyone else? How can we possibly lie to ourselves? Well, let me think back to when I was lost in the sickness of my addiction…I didn’t have a problem. I didn’t need help. I had it under control. Hmmm…lie, lie, and lie! I believed it though. When it comes to dealing with yourself, when it comes to self-examination, when it comes to taking an inward look, you’re only going to see what you want and believe what you want. It’s just as easy to blind ourselves to the truth as it is to put on a show for others.

Then there’s who we ACTUALLY ARE…

Well, that’s a question that only you can answer. God already knows. The question is, do you? Over the next few days I’ll be discussing how we can overcome the show we put on for others, the lies we tell ourselves, and how to embrace the reality of WHO WE ACTUALLY ARE!

4 Things I Want To Share With You

Here are 4 things I want to share with you today…

#1 You Can’t Do It Alone—I know, maybe that’s NOT the way you want to start your day, maybe that’s NOT the first thing you want to read, but it’s true. I spent nearly 30 years thinking I could do this thing called life on my own and what did it get me? Heartache. Pain. Addiction. Frustration. The list seriously goes on and on. It wasn’t until I turned my life over the Jesus, it wasn’t until I realized I did not have the answers, I did not have the strength, that I was finally able to SEE CLEARLY and MOVE FORWARD with the HOPE of a BETTER TOMORROW. It wasn’t until I surrounded myself with people I trust (learning to trust people is an entirely different story waiting to be told), people that would hold me accountable, speak into my life, that I was able to move BEYOND the lies of my DEPRESSION. You cannot do it alone and you don’t have to do it alone.

#2 You’re Not Good Enough—Wow! Doesn’t that just brighten your day? Someone just read this and thought, “What is he talking about? I'm a good person.” No you’re not. I won’t get into the gross details, but God says differently (Isaiah 64:6). Too many of us believe the lie that if we are simply a good person, that if we help people, and think nice thoughts, and maybe even look pretty on the outside that we’ll somehow earn God’s favor. Nope. There’s nothing you or I can do to win God’s grace. Jesus did that for us on the cross. I’m not good enough. I’m not strong enough. I’m not smart enough. And I definitely don’t deserve it. That’s the beauty of God’s grace, we DON’T deserve it, but he gives it to us anyways…or at least offers it to us (Romans 5:8). On my own I’m not good enough, but Jesus living inside me is.

#3 Jesus Is All You’ll Ever Need—This may sound cliché, but it’s in Christ that we find NEW LIFE. It’s because of his work on the cross, it’s because of his death, burial, and resurrection that we can experience the presence of God once more. Jesus is the KEY to living FREE. When you allow him to become your EVERYTHING, there’s no more room for your addictions, for your past hurts, for the memories of the mistakes you’ve made, bitterness, resentment, guilt, shame (Romans 8:31-39). Everything – Jesus = Nothing. Jesus + Nothing = Everything.

#4 I LOVE MY CHURCH!—Each week I am encouraged by stories of people who are letting go of their past and grabbing hold of God's ridiculous grace in their PRESENT! As good as it seems right now, it's only going to get BETTER! The BEST is yet to come!!

How Can I Trust Again?

By quick show of hands, who is overcome by fear with the thought of opening up, being honest, telling all? Who gets sick over the thought of allowing someone to get close enough to know the REAL you? You’re not alone.

Trust is a difficult thing. Chances are sometime in your past you were hurt by someone you trusted, someone you loved, someone close. And the result of this incident or series of occurrences was the spillover of mistrust into your future relationships and that mistrust eventually morphed and transformed into bitterness, resentment, and maybe even hate.

It’s tragic really.

Maybe it was your fault. Maybe you did something or said something you shouldn’t have. Then again, maybe it wasn’t your fault. Maybe you were the victim. In either case God makes it very clear that we, as followers of Christ, are NOT supposed to hold on to it.

Get rid of all bitterness, passion, and anger. No more shouting or insults, no more hateful feelings of any sort.
Ephesians 4:31 GNT

That’s pretty freakin’ clear. God doesn’t say brush it aside. God doesn’t say bury it with the rest of your hurts and pains. God doesn’t say ignore it. God says GET RID OF IT! He uses words like NO MORE…NO MORE! Easy for him to say right? What does he know? How could God, the Creator of the universe, the all-knowing, all-powerful, ever-present, even remotely grasp what it’s like?

Please allow me to point you to the cross. Beaten, battered, bruised, disfigured, murdered…all words that can be used to describe Jesus and the sacrifice he made. Let’s not forget he is God’s son. That’s his child. We killed him. Yet, in his infinite grace, God forgave us. We killed Jesus, but God resurrected him and, in doing so, reconciled our broken relationship with him. THAT’S getting rid of it!

Jesus said, “Forgive them, Father! They don't know what they are doing.”
Luke 23:34 GNT

Forgive them. In the midst of the brutality, Jesus ask God to forgive us. You’ve been hurt. You might actually be stuck in an abusive relationship RIGHT NOW. In Christ, there’s no offense too great to forgive. God says to GET RID OF IT! As long as you remain the VICTIM, you’ll never know what it means to stand as the VICTOR.

What are you holding on to today?

Who have you refused to forgive?

What baggage do you need to get rid of?

How To Take A Bath On Saturday...Sabbath?

Reading out of 2 Samuel this morning I was reminded of the reason, or at least one of the reasons, why we struggle with this idea of a Sabbath, this notion of rest. Start by looking around at others (typically easier for us to point out faults in others) and simply watch how hectic their lives are, the unsustainable pace, frantically moving from one task to another, one place to another, always moving, always going, always something. Now take a look, maybe a glance, at least a peak, inward and examine your daily life, your routine.

What’s it look like?
What are you doing?
Where are you going?
Who are you ignoring?
What are you chasing after?

As I said above I was reading from 2 Samuel this morning. As a matter of fact, take a few minutes and read 2 Samuel 11-12:23. Go ahead. Read it. What’s it say? What’s it tell you? What is it that we are supposed to learn from the life of David? Can you relate? Is it you?

I believe this story captures the very essence of why we struggle to find rest. I believe this story gets to the root of the issue and then some. The story of David, Bathsheba, and Uriah shows just how selfish we can be. We see something we like…we have to have it. Someone gets in our way…we get them out of the way. We want more. There’s never enough. The grass is always greener…

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that most of you have had someone killed in order to take their spouse, BUT I’m sure each of you has, in the past, maybe recent past, been driven to acquire something MORE. For David it was a woman. For you it might be a car, a house, some clothes, a position at work, a task, a goal, a SOMETHING that you DIDN’T HAVE and DIDN’T NEED. I do it. I’m sure you do it. David did it. The question is why do we do it and how do we stop it (ok, that was 2 questions).

Why do we do it?
We neglect rest, we ignore the people around us, and forgo our health in order to get the next big thing because we believe that thing will FULFILL THE VOID within us that ONLY JESUS CAN FILL! We start to trust in stuff, in something other than Jesus to find peace, to find rest, to be made whole. This is why we must keep up the pace. After we get one thing and enjoy a few fleeting moments of happiness, we immediately get up and must chase after the next. Instead of making room in our heart for Jesus, we clear out room in our stomachs for stuff. We trample our spiritual appetite and raise up our material appetite. We live as idolaters.

How do we stop it?
First and foremost you’ve gotta know this, nobody can MAKE you stop, nobody can CONVINCE you of the problem, nobody can TELL you what to do. You have to CHOOSE to get better (even now you’re asking, “Get better from what?” —my point exactly). I’ll state it as clearly as I possibly can: Jesus must become your EVERYTHING. When Jesus becomes your everything, you won’t need anything else. You won’t need that bigger house. You won’t need that new car. You won’t need the fancy clothes. You won’t need that online affair. You won’t need that addiction. You won’t need the baggage of your past. You won’t need any of this because you’ll have Jesus.

With Jesus your perspective changes from I NEED and I WANT to I ALREADY HAVE. And when you realize that you already have all that you need, you’ll be able to rest, to stop chasing after everything else. A Sabbath makes sense once you stop dwelling on the stuff you DON’T HAVE and focus on WHO HAS YOU!

What are you chasing after?

How Would You Define 'Worship'?

What IS worship? What does it mean TO worship? Who or what is the OBJECT of your worship?

These are important questions and each can be quite difficult to answer. In fact, I bet if you asked ten people, you’d receive ten different answers (considering out of thirty total answers, twenty might be the same…). I imagine you’d receive answers like:

#1 Worship Is Singing At Church—This is true, in a sense. Churches across the blue and green planet gather weekly, some multiple times each week, spanning different days, and in a large percentage of them, there’s music or singing. Some churches have a band with lyrics projected on a screen. Other churches have a choir. And still other churches sing together out of a book (minus the band).

Yes, singing, playing instruments…music in general IS one aspect of worship. Read Psalm 33:1-3; 98:1-9; Ephesian 5:15-21; Colossians 3:12-17; Revelation 15:1-8 (yes, they even sing in heaven).

#2 Worship Is Lifting My Hands While Singing—I remember the first few times I attended church, well maybe this thought still comes to mind, but I distinctly remember the first time I saw someone raising their hands at church and thinking, “Is someone going to answer their question?” Then I saw more people doing it. Weirdos. What the heck were they doing? I was trying to read the words on the screen and instead I was looking at this lady’s giant gold rings and French manicure…I think I hear my son crying.

Yes, raising your hands is a sign of, form of, part of, aspect of (however you want to state it) worship. It’s like raising a white flag. It’s a sign of surrender. It’s acknowledging his greatness and my weakness. It’s declaring my need for his presence. Read Psalm 134:1-3; Lamentations 3:39-41; 1 Timothy 2:8.

#3 I Worship God—This will probably be the most common answer, however, you can most likely write in any of the triune names (Father, Son, Holy Spirit) and be right. Whether your church is singing hymns by Isaac Watts or songs by Chris Tomlin the lyrics point to the cross of Christ, the greatness of God, his power, his presence, sacrifice, salvation…bringing people together with one voice, one purpose, one heart, OH! AND providing 3-5 minute lessons in theology.

Yes, we worship God. Read all of the previously listed verse and notice the WHO of each one.

Before I close out my thoughts this morning I want to direct you to think of a few other things, ideas, personal musings. As I mentioned above, singing is merely ONE aspect of worship. Worship also includes our time together (in the church world this is referred to as fellowship—yes, we sometimes gather together in search of the one ring), listening to and learning from sermon/ message/ lesson, praying, AND, oh dare I say it?…tithing (don’t believe me? Google it).

When it comes to raising your hands, you don't HAVE to do it…you’re just more spiritual if you do (sarcasm). Remember, you’re not the person next to you and they are not you. Someone might raise their hands, but that doesn’t mean you have to do it. Someone behind you might shout out and scare the crap out of you, but that doesn’t mean you have to do it. Worship is birthed in your heart, how you express it, is entirely up to you.

As discussed in #3 worship is FOR God and TO God. It’s not a matter of preference. If you think worship only takes place during the songs you like, then you think worship is about you. Remember, it’s not about you. Set aside your god-complex and worship him, not yourself.

Ok, I’ll stop here for now. What would you add?

4 Questions I Have For You

What is it about us, about us as people, that keeps us always wanting more, striving for the next great thing, seeking something bigger, better, grander, higher? What is it that keeps us from focusing on the here and now? What is it that holds our attention in what may come or what has been?

When is enough, enough?

For whatever reason people feel free to share their hurts and struggles with me. I love it. I love knowing people find comfort in being open and honest…of being vulnerable. I love seeing people be real. But (hate that word…BUT I’m using it anyways) I allow myself to grow frustrated, maybe even annoyed at it sometimes. I hear people share about the same struggles over and over, time and time again. I want to ask…

When is enough, enough?

I believe the reason we’re constantly looking forward or backwards, I believe the reason we’re always searching for the next big thing, I believe the reason we desire to have more, is simply because IT’S EASIER THAN APPRECIATING WHO YOU ARE, WHERE YOU ARE, AND WHAT YOU HAVE.

Here’s what I want to know…

#1 When Will Your Desires Become More Than Dreams?—As people we sure do like to talk, don’t we? We like to paint pictures of what we’d like to do or where we’d like to go or what we’d like to have, but rarely do we acknowledge where we’re at. We remain stuck behind the veil of talk and chatter. It’s as if we’re frozen from any sort of forward moment. We identify ourselves with past hurts, failures, addictions, and so on. We SAY we want to be different and LIVE like we’re content where we are. I want to be FREE…can I get a cigarette from you? I want to FREE…want me to grab you a drink from the bar? I want to be FREE…I just need a new boyfriend. Why don’t you just be honest and say, “I want to be FREE, but I’m unwilling to do anything about it.” THAT makes more sense to me. THAT’S being honest. Jesus said if you have the faith of a mustard seed, a teeny, tiny mustard seed, you could move mountains (Matthew 17:20). Stop dreaming and start DOING! Do you believe God CAN set you free? Do you believe God WILL set you free?

#2 When Will Your Desire To Live Be Greater Than Your Desire To Die?—Wallowing in the crap of your past is the equivalent of climbing into the coffin and shutting it all by yourself. You’ve got to CHOOSE TO LIVE. Saying you want peace, saying you want rest, saying you want freedom is not the same was doing something to affect some sort of change in your life. You’ve got to WANT it and you’ve got to want it enough to LET GO OF THE CRAP. I will never downplay your pain. I will never downplay the hurts you’ve experienced. I will never tell you to simply get over it. I will tell you to WORK THROUGH IT. I serve a God who is GREATER than your circumstance and more than ABLE to bring you through it. How bad do you want it? Do you want to live?

#3 When Will You Stop Playing The Victim And Start Claiming The Victor?—Jesus is my everything. Jesus could be your everything…if you’d just let him. He conquered the grave. He trampled death to give you life. He suffered death so you could experience life. I’m not the pain of my past. I’m not the physical or sexual abuse. I’m no longer cowering in the corner of a prison of mistrust and anger. Jesus took the burden of my past pain, hurts, and mistakes and in exchange he gave me NEW LIFE, he gave me REST, he gave me PEACE, he gave me VICTORY (Matthew 11:28-30)!

#4 My question for you today is when will enough, be enough?

How Can I Get Over The Pain Of My Past?

Step 4: We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

The fourth step describes this thing, this often scary, this sometimes overwhelming process, procedure, action…step, known as an INVENTORY. The fourth step doesn’t just stop there, oh no, it uses words like SEARCHING, FEARLESS, and MORAL to describe it. Ok, before we dive into those words, before we feel that punch in the gut that complete and total honesty brings, let’s first talk about INVENTORY—what is it?

According to the dictionary, an INVENTORY is described as a detailed, often descriptive, list of articles; to take stock of; to evaluate; to summarize; a complete listing. For most of us that makes sense for items stored away in your pantry, refrigerator, maybe supply closets at work, raw materials on a job, etc. When it comes to Step 4, an INVENTORY is all that, only it’s applied to you, to me, to our past, to our present.

Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.
Lamentations 3:40 NIV

Scary right?

Sadly, a VAST number of people walk away from recovery at this point. We don’t want to delve into the pain of our past. We don’t want to share our past mistakes. We don’t want to revisit the abuse. We don’t want to reawaken those feelings. We’re content WITH JUST GETTING BY. We believe IT’S AS GOOD AS IT GETS. We’d rather leave our hurts, our pain buried beneath other pain, suppressed, ignored, festering, poisoning…we choose to live a so-so life and fail to realize that the ABUNDANT LIFE is there for the taking.

The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.
John 10:10 NKJV

Jesus died on the cross to set you FREE, not hold you HOSTAGE. You’re already a hostage, a captive, a prisoner to the pain, the hurts, the secrets of your past. It’s like you’re stuck in a cage, BUT it’s unlocked, the door is open, and instead of swinging it open, you’re choosing to hold it shut. If you want to be freed from the crap of your past you’ve gotta LET GO! An INVENTORY is the process of letting go.

SEARCHING…I examine my past, my hurts, my pain, my actions, my experiences.
FEARLESS…Nothing is off limits; fear has kept me locked in a cell for far too long, I’m letting go!
MORAL…I take the good with the bad, the right and the wrong, maintaining some sense of balance.
INVENTORY…A comprehensive catalog of the events in my life, of things I’ve done and things done to me.

I want to see you set FREE. I want to see you experience JOY. I want to see you living the life you never thought possible!

Is My View Of God Too Small?

I’m pretty sure it’s safe to say that most people want to BE a part of something bigger than they are or at least FEEL as if they are. We want to change the world. We want to end world hunger. We want to see children experience fresh drinking water for the first time. We want to see the homeless walk through the front door of a new home or new job. We want to see the multitude of orphans across the globe find families. We want to make a difference. We want to matter. We want purpose.

What’s stopping you?
What’s holding you back?
What’s keeping you from realizing your dreams and aspirations?

Maybe you feel like you don’t have the TIME. How much is enough?
Maybe you feel like you don’t have the RESOURCES. How much is enough?
Maybe you feel like you don’t have the ABILITY. How much is enough?

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?
Romans 8:31-32 NKJV

When God places a burden in your heart, he gives you a PURPOSE. When God places a burden in your heart, he gives you a DREAM, something to pursue. When God places a burden in your heart, he does it knowing YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO MAKE IT HAPPEN!

The problem is we tend to have more faith in our DOUBTS than our GOD. We believe the LIES in light of the TRUTH. We say we believe in a God who resurrected his son, defeated the grave, conquered death, overcame the penalty of sin, reconciled us into God’s presence, BUT we doubt his GREATNESS, his MAJESTY, his POWER in our lives. God is great enough to do all that stuff, but there’s no way he can possibly do that in my life.

Really?

God wants to change this world. God wants to see the lost get saved. God wants to reconcile the poor, the needy, the widows, the orphans into his loving embrace and he wants to do it THROUGH YOU AND ME!

Will you believe in him enough to see it happen?